Why I am vowing to never touch a diet again

Good evening everyone!

I have had a lot on my mind today, and I have got to be honest with you all. Though this is hard for me to admit, I am not where I was when I started this blog, in terms of having a healthy relationship with food.

When I started the blog, I wanted to show you girls what it was like to live a healthy life,FREE from the bondage of dieting and counting calories. I was at such a healthy place in my life, not only because I ate healthy, but because I allowed myself ALL the foods that I loved, in moderation. I didn’t restrict myself from any food, and I didn’t follow a single diet. All I did was wake up in the morning, listen to my body through the entire day, eat only what I was craving, and I ate when I was hungry- not when someone else told me I should eat.

It turned out that I learned a whole lot about myself through doing that. I learned that I like to eat lots of small things throughout the day, I don’t like having a super full feeling tummy, I love to exercise when it’s fun, my body requires a good amount of sleep each night, I do so much better when I’m not dieting, and that it is truly, truly, truly the inside that matters, and that the only thing that fully helped me recover, was learning to love myself no matter what my body looked like on the outside. Turns out- this made me feel more beautiful! Who woulda thought?! 😛

When I first started my blog, about a year ago, I described it like this:

“I find that the most enjoyable way for me to be healthy, is to not be hard on myself, and allow myself to enjoy everything about living well. The only way for me to achieve this, is through balance and moderation. So yes, I will post plenty of healthy things, because I eat plenty of healthy things. But there will also be things that may not be considered so healthy. But, that’s okay! I try and pick healthier choices whenever I can, but if I feel like, lets say a burrito, or a piece of pie, then I go for it. I don’t jump in and eat the whole pie, I just simply cut a slice, and enjoy it. Then, my very next meal, I eat something healthy. I don’t freak out and beat myself up, skip dinner, and say “okay, I’ll be better tomorrow!” I just enjoy my food, and keep going. Trust me friends, I wouldn’t be saying this unless I had gone through all the ups & downs myself.. I have been through a ton of struggles with food, I just finally found a balance that works for me.”

At this point, I was at peace with my food, proud of my achievements, and moving forward. I didn’t start this blog to go on another diet, I didn’t want to show the world how to get skinny and in shape, I started it to share my story with girls who could relate to me, and who wanted to finally have peace with their relationship to food, because boy, it can be a real battle out there.

Lately, I have not been the best at portraying that (and I am sorry), because I have not been living up to that calm, healthy mindset. I would say the past 6 months, I have slowly started to fall back into wanting to lose weight, dieting, and losing a connection with myself. The truth is, I always feel like I need to be in control of something in my life, and dieting is one thing that I can fully control. I am starting to believe that’s why I resort to it so often. But the real truth, is that my identity, and your identity, is not found by what the scale told you this morning, or how well you did on your ‘diet’ yesterday. Your identity is the person that you are, regardless of your weight. You are fully loved no matter what you weigh, and you are beautiful, because you were created beautifully.

We are all different, and we all have different goals. Some want to gain weight, some want to lose, and some want to maintain. Some do well with diets, some don’t. Some like to eat three bigger meals a day, some like to have 5/6 small meals. The point is, everyone is different, and needs to find what works for them. I know what works for me, and what I do, may not work for you. All I want to do, is inspire you to be the “you’est you that you can be,” and be fully proud of that!

I took the whole day today to listen to my body 100%, eat whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted, and in whatever portions I wanted. By allowing myself all of these things, I felt more able to choose healthy foods (because in having freedom to choose, they sounded better), eat slower, leave some food in my plate to save for later, and by doing this, I felt so much happier because I was enjoying everything a million times more!

I am going to continue this, everyday for a week at a time, taking small steps back to the healthy me that I was a year ago (and still am underneath). After just one day, I am feeling so much better, but I know for these things to really stick, they take time. Diet is now a four letter word in my vocab (thank you Kayla), and I am making a promise to myself that it will stay that way.

I know one thing is for sure, I don’t want to look back on my life in 60 years and finallyrealize that I wasted all that time stressing over my body and what was going in my mouth. I want  to look back on life and know that I treated myself to the best of my ability, and appreciated who I was.

So, here is to being healthy, listening to our bodies, and getting back to the basics and jewels of this blog- the whole reason I started it in the first place!

Breakfast- I woke up this morning wanting something cold in my tummy. It was either going to be cereal or yogurt.

I resorted to the yogurt because all the toppings sounded so good! I put one banana, flaxseed, and agave on top.

I get this Greek Yogurt from Costco 🙂

For lunch today, I drove to the Valley to have lunch with my best friend Kayla 🙂

We went to the Whole Foods on Ventura Blvd. It. was. beautiful! We already have an obsession with Whole Foods, so Kayla wanted to show me her favorite one. It was so nice!

For lunch, we got the salad bar because you get a deal on Wednesday 🙂 I filled mine up with all kinds of delicious things! I even tried a falafel for the first time! It was good, but better all heated up when I got home. I ate about half at lunch, and the rest later this evening.

We had to snap a quick picture before I took off.

I love you K. You’re the best! Thanks for allowing me to talk your ear off today! Haha, you’re the best listener and talker I’ve ever met! She even encouraged me to be very honestly with all y’all 😉

When I got home a couple hours later, I had a piece of Cinnamon Raison Ezekiel Bread that Kayla sent home with me. I topped it with a little bit of Peanut Butter. This Bread was great! I will most definitely be buying some when I go to Trader Joe’s next!

When I got to my babysitting job tonight, I had one chocolate covered strawberry that my Mom made 🙂 This was my dessert/petite treat tonight.

Yea, remember when I used to have a petite treat every night? I miss that, too! Let’s get back to it! 😉

A short while after that, I had my last meal of the day. Oatmeal!

Without exaggeration, this might just be the best bowl of Oatmeal I have ever had!! Ahhh, so good! And I ate it super slow so that I could fully enjoy it. I SURE DID!

It had one pack of Maple Brown Sugar Oatmeal from TJ’s, one banana all chopped up, 1/2 cup almond milk, 1/2 cup water (these were all heated in the pot), then it was topped with about 1 tsp. of white chocolate morsels, and some walnuts & shredded coconut. Oh my oh my oh my oh! So good! I seriously recommend the white chocolate chips! When they melt, they are to die for!

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13 Comments

Filed under Breakfast, Dinner, Eating Out, Lunch

13 responses to “Why I am vowing to never touch a diet again

  1. Have you had the Ezekiel English Cinnamon Raisin muffins? They are REALLY good with a little PB on them! I think Lassen’s carries them… 🙂
    So glad you are trying to listen to your body, was getting a little worried for you for the past week or so! 😦

    • No I haven’t but that sounds so good! Oh my goodness! I am going to have to pick some up! I have only the original bread, and the tortillas.
      Thank you Alyssa. I appreciate that! I can’t wait to just get back to enjoying everything everyday! Today was already a million times better. NO MORE DIETING!

  2. Mallory Finnerty

    Paige! I am so proud of you for posting this. I know how challenging our relationships with food can be. I’ve been there, and I still think I’m trying to figure it out! I’m on Weight Watchers right now (I lost 20 pounds on it last year), but it is still a battle for me to keep up a healthy relationship with food and not be controlled by it. I am glad you were able to reevaluate where you were at! And I really appreciate your honesty, girl. XOX Mallory

    • Mallory! Thank you so, so much! It definitely can be challenging, and OH BOY do I know what you mean when you say “it is still a battle for me to keep up a healthy relationship with food and not be controlled by it.” It sure is! That was one of the biggest things I was realizing recently, was that food was controlling ME! Not only was it keeping me from going out, but it was keeping me from even having fun in my own home.. that’s not right. We weren’t meant to live like that! I have done Weight Watchers before too, it is a commitment, but like I said, there is something different for everyone. I have an Aunt who LOVES weight watchers. But for me, it’s just another obsession.. For you, it might be great! My best advice would be to find something that makes you happy, and that you would be pleased to stick to for your whole life. Make little steps- they make the biggest difference!

  3. It’s amazing how much food can control our lives!! Especially as women. But, I think you are right on track with your thinking 🙂 It’s more important to live real life than to be caught up in obsessing over stupid food. Can’t live with it and can’t live without it 🙂 Thanks for sharing this… it’s inspiring. How are we supposed to let our lives impact others without sharing our stories? They are so powerful.

    Also… I am OBSESSED with Whole Foods on Ventura Blvd… it’s the best!!… besides the Venice Whole Foods.. if you haven’t been you NEED to go. unreal!

    • Jacey! Amen, girl! It is so much more important to live a real life, than to be caught up with food and dieting! I am so glad the story inspired you!

      Yes! The Ventura Blvd one is so good! And NO! I haven’t been to the one in Venice! Now I REALLY want to go! I’m totally calling my friend right now to tell her we need to go! Haha 🙂 THANK YOU! Be watching for a post on the Venice Whole Foods 😉

  4. I’m so happy for you Paige! It takes a lot of courage to not only admit what you really want to yourself, but also to the world. I must also say I’m happy on a personal level. I still enjoyed your blog when you were dieting, but I enjoy it even more when you do it this way. I find that I’m able to relate better and I’m more inspired and motivated. Diets don’t work for me because restricting what I eat so heavily, and by someone else’s terms not mine, just isn’t feasible at this point in my life. So it’s great seeing you listen to your body and learn to crave healthy food, that’s what I’m trying to do now too! I’ve been following your blog for a year and I plan on continuing to read it as long as you’re posting! You really do continue to inspire me everyday. I struggle with my eating habits and although they haven’t gotten much better over the past year, I’m continuing to work towards it. Reading your blog helps me feel better. Instead of being mad at myself for not eating perfectly or losing weight, instead I try to proud of the accomplishments I have made such as eating more fruits and vegetables. I’m also trying to work on not comparing my eating habits with other people. Reading your blog is a good reminder that I have to do what’s right for me, and it’s OK if I don’t order the same thing as the thing as the thin women at the table. Thank you for everything you do Paige, and good luck with your plan! 🙂

    • Hi Jenny! I appreciate this message! Thank you so much for your input! Diets clearly do not work for me either, and I am so happy to be free of them now! I am so excited to post straight from my heart now, and not based off of some book that is telling me what to eat. I find so much more enjoyment in my blog, life, and every aspect of healthy eating when I do this! I love you girls, YOU guys inspire me right back! Thank you for being such a loyal reader! That is a really long time, and warms my heart to know you’ve been reading so long. THANK YOU 🙂

      And yes! It’s okay to order something different! Absolutely! And for all you know, the thin woman at the table might be trying to impress YOU! She may really want to order something different as well. It can go both ways. My counselor once told me, eat WHAT YOU WANT. Don’t worry about trying to be too good, especially around others. Show people that you can eat what you want, be okay with it, control your portions, and satisfy yourself. She said “who knows, there may be another girl there with an eating disorder, that really wants that piece of pizza, but won’t eat it unless someone else does. Wouldn’t it be great if you could be an example to ENJOY a piece or two, and then be done?” It’s so true! It’s such a great thing to be able to share our values and appreciation for food around others, because chances are, there are probably people around us who are also struggling.

      I wish you a great day ❤ 🙂 Thanks again for the comment

  5. lani

    white chocolate in your oatmeal.. i have to try that!

  6. Ohm.. Those healthy choices still look super delicious… Though I’m missing bread!

  7. Pingback: TrEAT Post: Candy Apple Nachos! | Healthy Hits the Spot

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